Baby Girl #2

She was a little shy but we finally got to see her face

We had my 20-week ultrasound this week and found out that Cadence is going to have a little sister!

We are so thrilled and excited to meet this little goose, volume two.  My sisters are my best and closest friends and I'm so excited for Cadie and Baby Girl #2 to have that as well.  Sibling relationships are the longest of our lives--more than parents, more than spouses--and we don't take this amazing little being for granted. Everything looked healthy on the scans and I can't believe this pregnancy is already halfway over, I feel like it has flown by!  We hadn't really even started to pick names so if you have some suggestions, let us know :)

20 weeks and finally hitting that second trimester sweet spot


4th of July

It was such a nice, long holiday weekend. The 4th of July is easily creeping up the ranks of my favorite holidays.  It's fireworks, family barbecues, and fun in the sun. It was so great to just relax and watch the Sugar House fireworks from our front yard like I did as a child.  Cadie had so much fun playing with her cute cousins who just can't seem to get enough of her (I can't blame them).

The kids had a hard time staying in their seats for the whole show....Grammy was the only one left :)

It was also so fun to meet Cadie's newest cousin, Kinsley McCall Shoff. She finally got to come home after a week in the NICU, but she's doing great and we were so happy to get to hold her :)


Summer Fun 2015

...and Cadence couldn't be more thrilled!
Oh my goodness June is almost over.  It's 100 degrees outside and I think it's safe to say that summer is in full swing. I wanted to get at least one more post in before the month was over and I've been meaning to at least post some pictures from Cadie's 1st birthday party.

It was so fun to have everyone over for Cadie's birthday, she seemed to have a pretty good time if I do say so myself :)  We had both families over for a bbq complete with home-made ice cream (the best), and Cadie got her obligatory smash cake which was fun until we had to wash her off. She was not a fan of that part.

She is full-on walking now, she started walking basically on her first birthday and she is getting faster everyday. She's talking lots of gibberish but she's pretty sure she's saying real words. She is finally getting her teeth! (13 months later) and we are hoping that her recent proclivity for throwing tantrums is part of the teething process. And her hair is finally starting to come along (kinda) and looks like it will be a light honey brownish blonde.

I took Brody to Market street for a delicious Father's day dinner.  He recently got a position for a firm downtown, Pia Anderson, and is actually working in the same building as me, exactly one floor up. Such a small world but we are beyond thrilled by this great opportunity.  We made another small little announcement on Father's day, we are expecting baby #2 this December and are so excited to meet this little one.  We find out the sex in July so stay tuned!

Also, Salt Lake is getting Google Fiber and crews were in front of my parent's house all week working on the installation. Wahoo!


Cadie is One!

I can't believe my baby girl is a year old!  She is just the light of our life and is so full of personality we can't get enough. And. those. rolls. She's just so yummy! She is walking now, still a little unsure of herself but she's making so much progress!

We took a bunch of photos for her invitations and some of the faces she pulled, it was really entertaining :)


Beautiful Feminism

I remember it had been a long, exhausting Monday. I'd had to stay an hour late for work, I was pregnant, and my cankles were out in full force, and I was just so happy to be going home.

I gratefully got on the elevator with an older gentleman. I must have had a somewhat subdued and less-than-thrilled expression on my face, because he turned to me, a complete stranger, and said something along the lines of, "Oh come one, you can smile, it can't be that bad."

I must have given a courteous half-smile, which was probably all I could muster, and we both went our separate ways when we got to the lobby.

Now, I know this guy was completely well-intentioned. I know he was probably just trying to make me feel better....somehow. But the more I thought about it, the more sure I became that if I had been a man, he wouldn't have said anything at all.  He would have just let me be.  He probably would have assumed I'd had an important business deal that had gone south, maybe I'd just gotten off a long conference call. I don't think he would have told Brody to cheer up and smile.  But being a young woman, I'm supposed to be perky and cheerful. I'm supposed to give him a big, bright smile when I get on the elevator.

I know that's me being extra sensitive. I know he meant well, really I do. But stuff like this happens all the time and after a while it's just grating.  At my first full-time job after college I had this one co-worker, a much older married man with lots of kids and a wife at home.  He would linger at my desk way longer than was welcome. He would make comments about my appearance that he wouldn't have said in front of his wife in a million years.  And I never said anything. I always played it off as a joke, not wanting to stir the pot. I never reported him to HR and by my inaction, I taught this perv that it was okay to treat women that way. And I still haven't forgiven myself for it. I hate this man.  To this day, I use the word hate with as much venom as I can ascribe to describe my feelings towards him. My skin would crawl when he was near me. I was actually uncomfortable in the workplace because of him and I let him get away with it. So yes, because of that experience, I'm probably extra sensitive to sexism. But never again. The other day when a different male co-worker described a couple of the guys in the office as "...working with a bunch of girls". I quickly reprimanded him "You say that as though it's a bad thing!" I absolutely put him in his place, and he probably thinks I'm a real word-that-rhymes-with-witch now.  And I'm more than okay with that if it means he stops using that completely sexist expression. At my last job there was a creeper guy that used to address a bunch of the girls in the office as My ____, like my Mary or my Suzie but every guy in the office was Mr. _______.  Really!?  Not to mention he did things and said things to some of the girls that was absolutely sexual harassment, so we reported him to HR.  Recently, I applied for a job that I was more than qualified for, and even according to the guy that interviewed me I was, and I quote, "...practically perfect in every way." Just like Mary Poppins. But because I have a one-year-old at home, and I'm a woman, I didn't get the job. He basically told me that in so many words when he explained to me that they were going with someone else.  I doubt Brody will ever get passed up for a job because he has a child at home.

Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful I live in a place like the US and at a time when women have such incredible opportunities.  Thanks to amazing women in the past, like my own mother, I have so much at my fingertips and have enjoyed a life full of amazing experiences and opportunities. But that doesn't mean we can't do better.

I am a feminist.  That doesn't mean I burn bras on the weekend and hate men, really it doesn't. It means that I believe women should be free to choose for themselves.  If you choose to be a stay-at-home mom, more power to you. If you choose to start your own company, go for it.  It means I believe that I should get payed just as much as a man for doing the same job.  It doesn't mean I don't love it when a guy opens the door for me.  It just means I believe in equality...that's about it.  So I don't understand when and why the word feminist got such a negative connotation.  But I feel like it's finally starting to come back around and people are becoming more educated on what it actually means to be a feminist and it's exciting.


Pretty Good

I'm not that big of a Star Wars nerd but I thought this was pretty funny for those who are super into it. Plus I loved Interstellar so it works on multiple levels.  I am really excited for the reboot though!

Going Deep

Last summer, as we were road-tripping across the country, I think when we were in Illinois to be exact, we drove through some crazy scary rain and thunder and lightening and possible tornadoes.  Brody was driving, I was in the back next to Cadence, gripping the door handle with white knuckles and my heart in my throat.  We were going super slow, like 10 mph, but there was so much water on the roads, the car hydroplaned a couple of times.  Visibility was almost nothing, and at one point we thought our car may have actually been hit by lightening.  We had turned our music off and were scanning the local radio stations in case of tornado warnings.

I was terrified.

Having been in a pretty bad weather-related accident when I was in college, I'm already a nervous passenger, so I think I held my breath for about twenty minutes when we drove through the worst of it.  I remember when the lightening struck, I immediately turned to Cadence, thinking she would be frightened or start crying and I would have to comfort her.  She, however, was blissfully unaware that there was anything to be afraid of. She was happily fiddling with a toy and in her own little world. Business as usual for her.  Totally unaware and unafraid, happy as a clam.  And I remember thinking how strange it was and wishing I could be like that too. Plug me back into the matrix please.

I often worry about what kind of world I'm raising her in.  One where social media will give her an actual, numerical count of how many people "like" her, or how many "friends" she has. One where she will always know if there is a party or some other gathering that she wasn't invited to because people will be posting pictures of it, in real time. Where bullies and mean girls have so many different platforms to comment, demean, and belittle. Where you are constantly comparing your worst to someone's highly-edited best.  It's a little overwhelming and it's almost enough to make me want to move to the middle of nowhere and live totally off the grid.  (I'd never actually make it but you get the idea).

But at some point she is going to learn to be afraid of the storm. She is going to come out of the blissful ignorance and innocence of childhood (as much as I'd love to keep her there forever), and she is going to need to be prepared.  And the good news that I have to remind myself of, is that as much as social media can be horrible and evil, it can be just as much a force for good.  Things like the #LikeAGirl campaign and all these wonderful anti-photoshop and pre-photoshop viral videos. Female characters that are strong and smart and aren't waiting to be saved by a guy.  A world where a female president is an actual possibility (even though I think Hilary is SHADY-AS-SHIZ for that whole deleted personal email servers thing).

We are going to just have to make sure her self-esteem is rooted in things that are real and good. Teach her that she is smart and capable. That she can be the player on the field and not the cheerleader on the sidelines.  That her value is so much more than a number on a scale, or number of 'likes'.  That the world is a beautiful place, and is so much bigger than the bubble of her high school. That people are people no matter their religion or skin color or sexual orientation. That you treat the garbage man with as much respect as you'd treat the Queen of England. Teach her kindness and courage. That the term "trophy wife" is on par with most swear words ;)  Teach her that she has divine heritage, that she was made by God, and he doesn't make mistakes. Teach her to love herself and be comfortable in her own skin. And teach her to love others and not burden herself with trying to judge them. Teach her empathy and forgiveness, and that when she falls, to pick herself back up.

Pheeeew! No pressure, right?  At least for now I can just enjoy her innocence and try and avoid the storm as long as possible.